May I suggest if you haven’t read last week’s post, Soul Rest in Restless Days that you scroll down and read it first. It will provide a context for these words.

The Corona virus is changing me. I’ve been home and good things are resulting. Psalm 23 and Psalm 139 are influencing me. Many of the ah-ha’s I’m observing rest in the truths David speaks in these Psalms. I hope I don’t return to my former ways!

These are re-setting weeks. I’m recording what I’m hearing. I wonder if you identify with any of these coronial confessions.

“Is there anyplace I can go to avoid your Spirit? to be out of your sight?”
Psalm 139:7, The Message

No! God’s Spirit is with me, making itself known in the quietness of these at-home days. And I’m learning …

1. I’m easily tempted. I want to do it all! I receive many invitations for classes or seminars online in these weeks, every one in my area of interests. They all sound  good. “I’m an open book to you; even from a distance, you know what I’m thinking.” Psalm 139:2, The Message. Or in ESV, “you discern my thoughts from afar.” God is a discerning God (He knows what I’m thinking … I want to say yes). Like God, I need to be discerning. In his book, Essentialism: The Disciplined Pursuit of Less, Greg McKeown says, “If the answer isn’t a definite yes, then it should be a no.” One reason something is a no in these days is because saying yes required more screen time — something I don’t need.

2. I love ministry. Okay, this isn’t a new thought, it’s a warning though. God determines my capacity. Whatever group I join, I naturally begin thinking, who in this group can I reach out to? Another question I must consider, do I have capacity for additional relationships? “You … are acquainted with all my ways.” Psalm 139:3. I too need to be in tune with all my ways.

3. I’m a leader by design. But, I don’t need to lead everything. All my thoughts are not needed. I can and need to allow others to initiate. Will I allow God to lead? Asking this question has sometimes stopped me. “Even there you hand shall lead me…” Psalm 139:10. According to my good friend at TrueFace, “My influence is about stewardship.”(not leadership)

4. My excuses are evaporating on writing a manuscript on rest. (This is scary to put in writing!) In the stillness of these days, God has gently reminded me of this leading. The words I wrote on the Exodus 3 and 4 narrative have spoken clearly, as have several other instances. “Oh, my Lord, I am not eloquent … ‘Who has made [wo]man’s mouth?'” Exodus 4:10 and 11

5. I’ve not thought of myself as a controlling person. It’s easy to see that in others. God is fine-tuning me. I don’t like that calendar control has slipped from my hands.  I want to know the next time I will visit our GRANDS. I want to plan having friends in for dinner. “Every day of my life was recorded in you book. Every moment was laid out before a single day had passed.” Psalm 139:16, NLT. This truth begs, will I trust God?

6. I sleep better when I’m tired. I can hear you saying, duh! This thought is prioritizing how I spend my day, and how I prepare for sleep. For someone who loves writing, it’s too easy to put exercise at the bottom of my want-to-do list. And if I sleep better, even my writing flows more easily. “… for he gives to his beloved sleep.” Psalm 127:2. This is another trust issue.

7. It’s easy to hi-jack a good opportunity with my do-list. It’s a beautiful day (tomorrow it could snow). I wonder, should I alter my plans to enjoy this gift of spring-like weather? God has given a gift, will I receive it?

8. My love language is words. In 1992 Gary Chapman authored The Five Love Languages. As Bill and I have talked about this over the years, we agree that we both want to experience all five: words, time, gifts, service, touch. This is still true, but words have crept to the top for me. And I’m married to an introvert!

Love languages are a way to experience the need for love God has created in me. I can’t expect Bill to meet a need that God has reserved for himself. One love need we have is attention. Again, I find myself reviewing those God-given needs and asking God to meet them. Sometimes the answer comes from Bill, sometimes from others, sometimes in a book I’m reading, sometimes from God himself. “Thank you for making me so wonderfully complex! Your workmanship is marvelous — how well I know it.” Psalm 139:14, NLT.

9. We can still eat if we visit the grocery store once every two weeks.

I’m leaving a blank page in my journal; I’m guessing this list is going to grow.

Perhaps the most important thing I’m realizing is summed up in Psalm 139:17. In The Message they read, “Your thoughts — how rare, how beautiful! God, I’ll never comprehend them!”

God reminds me to allow him to take the lead.
God is at work continually conforming my character.
God cares about my experiencing soul rest.

“He leads me in the paths of righteousness
for his name’s sake.”
Psalm 23:3, ESV

“True to your word, you let me catch my breath
and send me in the right direction.”
Psalm 23:3, The Message

 

Copyright, May 2020, Sue Tell