This week’s post is a continuation of Hidden Love.  If you haven’t read it, I encourage you to click on the link and read it first.

Artwork by Sherry Graf; sherrygraf.com

Some realities are easy to turn into requests for prayer. My aunt has the flu; my GRAND broke her arm; my friend was recently diagnosed with cancer. These are okay requests. Please pray with me.

A few years ago, my husband was sharing with a Sunday school class about the clinical depression he lived with for a year. Everyone but one had left. The one approached and looked to the left and then to the right. Assured that they were now alone, he asked in a whisper … are you on medication? For that man, his struggle with depression was not a thing to be shared, not okay to ask for prayer. Finally he felt safe to say (whisper) it out loud. The key was hearing another share first.

More recently Bill and I participated on a panel on mental health. The large room was filled with teens and 20-somethings that knew about this reality first hand. They all knew each other. They didn’t know they had common struggles. Just showing up for the panel discussion brought a sense of okay-ness to their reality. They were not the only ones.

Depression, mental health issues … are these prayer requests that are okay to voice? My experience tells me, maybe, maybe not. My friend who counsels those with eating disorders told me, “I have found that people, even professionals, can feel even more intimidated with eating disorders.”

What about eating disorders for me? Or homosexual behavior; or transgender realities? My first reaction … keep this hidden. It is not okay to share this with other praying friends.

I realized I placed a hierarchy on prayer requests. Not all are to be shared. Believing that, leads to isolation and anxiety.

“So we have come to know and to believe
the love God has for us.
God is love, and whoever abides in love abides in God,
and God abides in him:”
I John 4:16

God asks, Sue, will you trust my love for you … even in this circumstance … and abide in it?

“The secret is Christ in me,
not me in a different set of circumstances.”
Elisabeth Elliot

The key: abiding in and trusting God’s love for me!

Some realities scare me. They affect relationships. They can lead to shame. Anxiety is real. I prayed alone. It was not okay to share with others. I kept in hidden. Nothing changed in me.

My reality shouted fear, not trust.

“The Lord is at hand. (near)
Have no anxiety about anything,”
Philippians 4:5,6, RSV, parentheses mine

I knew that verse. I wasn’t abiding in and trusting the truth I knew. Have no anxiety wasn’t my reality. And so I was not experiencing the promise offered, “and the peace of God, which passes all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.” Philippians 4:7.

Several years ago, my friend Kara who was struggling with severe breast cancer shared this wisdom with me … Ask, how am I living, not how am I doing?

Her wisdom is changing my okay-ness with what I ask prayer for. Her wisdom still calls me to abide and trust. Her wisdom is calming my anxiety.

To be continued: Next week on Echoes I will share how I’m living in the midst of this new reality. What I’m learning about the okay-ness of sharing, and how it is calming the anxiety. So do come back next Thursday for chapter 3 in my journey.

Copyright: Sue Tell, April 2024